Category Archives: sunday best

Best of the Naughties

First of all, how hilarious is it to call the recently departed decade the Naughties? I picked it up from Jezebel and Slate (I think) and I find it giggle inducing every time I say it.

Naughties. Giggle.

This decade was a whopper for me personally. Of course, it was one of only three that I’ve been alive and one of two that I’ve been a functioning member of society (i.e. having an age that’s in the double digits), so it wasn’t hard for it to be significant. I finished college, went to pastry school, went through several careers, fell in and out of love with a few men (in once more than out, fortunately), became the proud mama of two fabulous dogs, bought a house, and got three tattoos. I wholeheartedly adopted blogging, painting, twitter, compulsive furniture rearranging, orchids, vegetarianism, veganism (temporarily), and running. I made friends, lost friends, my brother moved away, my dad moved away and came back, my parents got divorced, and I gained and lost thirty pounds. As I said, a whopper.

However, turns out it’s near to impossible to remember tens years worth of movies and books. Here goes nothing – if I forget something incredible or critical or not-to-be-forgotten, remind me. That’s what the comments are for.

Movies

– There are so many reasons this movie stuck with me. 1) Michelle Rodriguez. She is hot and strong and I’ve been madly in love with her since long before her turn on Lost. 2) The naughties (giggle) were the decade of my slow birth as a feminist, and this movie was a large part of what kicked that off. 3) Punching. Lots of punching.

– Have you seen this? You see how Rose McGowan’s leg has been replaced by a machine gun? You see the big skull and crossbones on the hood of that car? Are you going to go out and rent it RIGHT NOW? What if I told you that the incredible Zoe Bell, who did Uma Thurman’s stunts in Kill Bill, played herself and did a whole scene where she rides on the hood of a car for fun? For FUN! Go rent it. I’m not even kidding. If you trust me, go buy it. You won’t be sorry. Do you need a little more encouragement? Ok, here is just one of many fake trailers that are included.

– Fine, maybe Slither isn’t technically a ‘good’ movie. You know what though? It’s the closest the naughties (giggle) came to a new Tremors, and Tremors is my favorite movie of all time. Of. All. Time. Shut UP. Also – Nathan Fillion, lookin all hot. As per usual.

TV

I’m going with three different categories here. First, best overall new show. Second, best single episode. Third, best character added in the naughties (giggle). Doesn’t that sound all sensible? I’m nothing if not sensible. Sensible sensible. Sensible. Ha.

Best New Show

– Ah Grey’s, how I love thee. With your extremely attractive doctors and your best-tv-relationship-EVER (Meredith and Derek, like I need to say it). With your story lines that made me skip everything on Thursday nights – dates, parties, classes, audiences with the pope, whatever. Please, never stop. Ever.

Best Single Episode

– Yeah yeah yeah I’m a gigantic geek. I’ve dealt with it. The musical episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer was fan-fucking-tastic and there are an entire posse of geeks out there that agree with me. See?

Best New Character

– YesfineI’mmorethanmildlyobsessedwithJossWhedoncanwemoveon? Winifred Burkle, from Angel. While Angel officially spun off from Buffy in 99, Fred wasn’t saved from her otherworldly cave of insanity until 2001 so this totally counts. Fred is neurotic and genius and pretty much the anti-Cordelia. If you don’t know who Cordelia is… well, I don’t know where to start. No, really. Just believe me when I say Fred is the girl every smart girl wants to be.

Online

– This was the decade of the mocking website. This Is Why You’re Fat, Cake Wrecks, Fuck You Penguin, Your Tattoo Sucks, Hot Chicks with Douchebags, Fail Blog – people, you have made meanness into an art. This was also, of course, the decade of LOLspeak – but we won’t talk about that.

– Emmanation.wordpress.com started in 2007 (sort of). I don’t know if you guys are reading that shit, but MAN it’s hilarious and insightful and just plain magical. You should go check it out.

Books

I’m sorry, loves, but this one is impossible. I have probably read upwards of 1000 books in the last ten years, and I cannot pick favorites. That’s like asking me to pick my favorite breath or my favorite strand of hair. Just not gonna happen. (Because I love breathing and I love my hair, get it? I am SO funny that sometimes I feel like I have to explain my funny. Just in case it was too funny.)

Social Phenomena

I’m not going to mention Myspace or Facebook or Twitter or Napster (because I never used Napster of course – hear me, FCC?). Partially because drrr, and partially because I’d like to look back on this ten years from now and not be mortified.

Speaking of mortification:

– I was in a band. We were called The Take. I wore skirts (what you’re seeing is the longest of my onstage skirts by several inches, in deference to the fact that it was like -2 the night we played at the Larimer Lounge) and Cons and sang songs with titles like Disease of Our Youth and thought I was the sexiest thing with a microphone. Because I was. Obviously.

This is normally where I’d segue into the people of the naughties (giggle) but I have a LOT of candidates – real life, celebs, four legged, etc. Therefore, I’m moving that to it’s very own post. Tomorrow, dear readers.

I hope that you enjoyed the naughties (giggle) as much as I obviously did.

My cold and I are going roller skating.

Muah.

1 Comment

Filed under girl geek, I have a pop culture problem, I make lists, it's all about me, sunday best, the people I love, things I think are pretty, turns out I'm a feminist

Best of 2009

I have a list of naughties bests that I’m working on, but it’s still in a little bit of flux, so I’m going to save it for when I’m done with this one.

Remember last year, when I did a best of 2008 post? That was fun, let’s do it again!  (Also, if you’ve been reading my blog for a year, bless you, I love you, many many smooches I am bestowing upon you.)

Movies

-The movie club started this year! We reviewed sooo many truly horrific movies, I’m not even going to list them all.

– I loved Coraline more than …. well, definitely more than the six year old that was in the theater with us at 9 on a Sunday night. The six year old that cried to his grandparents that he wanted to leave RIGHT NOW early in the film, and was told to wait it out because Coraline would win in the end. The same six year old that literally made a break for it when Bad Mommy turned into Bad Spider Mommy. I definitely loved it more than that kid, for sure.

TV

What’s that, Nathan Fillion? You’d like to sweep me off to a tropical island for a beach wedding and an eternity of happily ever after? Hm…let me thinkabou-Ok. Let’s go. No, of course I don’t need to pack anything, we won’t be wearing clothes. Obviously. Where’s the limo?

Online

-For me, this has been the year of discovering other bloggers. Temerity Jane, Aunt Becky and The Bloggess are my personal favorites for both their hilarity and their ability to whine about being sick with a frequency and enthusiasm that puts mine to shame.

Books

-It has been an AWESOME year for books, especially compared to last year. My two favorites were:

Social Phenomena

Yes, I am in enormous buckets full of love, thank you for asking.

-I’m a Rocky Mountain Rollergirl! I heard through the insanely frequently updated yahoo user group that one of the newbies has already passed her skills test… the gauntlet has been thrown. 2009 will forever be the year I started roller derby.

People

Maida is people, shut UP.

1 Comment

Filed under I have a pop culture problem, it's hard being this beautiful, sunday best, the people I love, they let me on skates?, things I think are pretty

Sunday Best

Third time on skates, baby.

Yes, I know it doesn’t look that impressive. Unless you’ve roller skated since your age started with a 2 or greater, I’m not interested in your opinion. This shit is hard.

 

1 Comment

Filed under it's all about me, nablopomo, sunday best, they let me on skates?

Sunday Best

The single best thing that happened this week was, without a doubt, the derby.

 

Septemeber_09 087

Zoom zoom.

My darling adventurous mother and my sweetpea Shovonda* accompanied me in my quest to make sure that I wasn’t going to get in WAY over my head when I try out.

 

Septemeber_09 082

Mom and Shovonda

They loved it just as much as I did, even though I drank two beers, mom drank one, and Sho had absolutely zero.

 

Septemeber_09 096

Mmmm, Corona. Sho is very tall and my mom is my height, which explains the downward slant of this photo.

I would post more pictures of the game, but what with the speedy rollin and the unzoominess of the iPhone camera, none are really worth looking at. The game, however, absolutely was.

After seeing a game, my conclusion is that not only COULD I do this, but I WANT to do this. The women seemed like besties-waiting-to-happen. The fans were dedicated and fun. The drag queen selling raffle tickets had those floopy nerf ball thingies in her bra.

I’d tell you more, but I have to go buy some skates. And work on a name. I’m thinking Maida Hater, but am still wide open to suggestions.

*Shovonda is not her real name. Last night when I told her she’d be in the blog today, she requested that she could pick up her own nickname, and this is what she chose. Any spelling mistake is mine.

 

 

 

1 Comment

Filed under I have a pop culture problem, nablopomo, sunday best, they let me on skates?

NaBloPoMo

Hey everybody, it’s NaBloPoMo! That’s National Blog Posting Month, for those of you that don’t require everything you write, say, or read to be condensed to it’s shortest possible length. U no wat I mean?

Basically, every single day in the month of November I will be putting up a post. Halloween hangover? Post. (This is sooo much worse than the candy hangovers I used to get. Give me a sugar crash any day of the week.) Tofurky and red wine tryptophan coma? Post. Have nothing interesting at all to say (like every day this last week)? Post.  This sounds awesome, huh.  Fortunately I will have the brotherly support of the tiniest sprinter – he’s doing it too.

While I considered making this my entire post for the day and returning to laying on the couch moaning, I did want to show you one thing in the spirit of Sunday Best.

I want this.

And this.

Thank you, perpetualkid.com, for allowing me to bring my horror movie obsession to rooms where it never before existed.

Leave a comment

Filed under money to burn (apparently), nablopomo, sunday best, things I think are pretty

Sunday Best

This is Alice. Alice sings for Crystal Castle, apparently. Alice drinks my personal brand of vodka straight from the bottle. Alice has the coolest fucking haircut ever. Im torn between marrying her and SWFing her - or maybe one then the other.

This is Alice. Alice sings for Crystal Castle, apparently. Alice drinks my personal brand of vodka straight from the bottle. Alice has the coolest fucking haircut ever. I'm torn between marrying her and SWFing her - or maybe one then the other.

Be sexy without having sex? What is the point in that? Jeez. Somebody should have run this by me, for sure.

Be sexy without having sex? What is the point in that? Jeez. Somebody should have run this by me, for sure.

Ohhhhhh! Youre being chaste for YOU, and sexy so your man doesnt leave you for someone who will have sex with him. I get it. Wait... do I get it? Candies Foundation, Im not sure I get it. Can you explain it again?

Ohhhhhh! You're being chaste for YOU, and sexy so your man doesn't leave you for someone who will have sex with him. I get it. Wait... do I get it? Candie's Foundation, I'm not sure I get it. Can you explain it again?

This makes me think of Heathers. I heard there was going to be a sequel or a remake or something..... did anyone else hear that? Anyway, dont try suicide, cause nobodys worth it.

This makes me think of Heathers. I heard there was going to be a sequel or a remake or something..... Anyway, don't try suicide, cause nobody's worth it.

“Sometimes along the way in my life I don’t want a smart woman, right now I want a dumb woman,” he said.

“Sometimes along the way in my life I don’t want a smart woman, right now I want a dumb woman,” he said.

Hey, remember when I was obsessed with big boobs? Now Im obsessed with parellel monogamous relationships. Which are apparently the future. Im so on the ball.

Hey, remember when I was obsessed with big boobs? Now I'm obsessed with polyamory. Which is the future, according to this article. I'm so ahead of the curve. (Aside from being futuristic, I have no idea what this picture has to do with polyamory being the future of relationships, but it clearly does.)

And finally….

I love you. I will miss you. Best. Legacy. Ever.

I love you. I will miss you. Best. Legacy. Ever.

1 Comment

Filed under sunday best

Sunday Best

 

What? No. Way. This is almost def a woman, based on the handwriting and background, right? NO. WAY. Dont lie, lady, you just make other girls feel bad.

What? No. Way. This is almost def a woman, based on the handwriting and background, right? Don't lie, lady, you just make other girls feel bad. Unless of course you mean the kind of sit up where you're HAVING SEX.

MUAH. Girl power. Rachel Alexandra is my hero.

MUAH. Girl power. Rachel Alexandra is my hero.

Megan Fox said shes bisexual, but wont sleep with other bisexual women, only gay women. Because, she says, men are disgusting and she doesnt want to sleep with a woman who has slept with a man. So... theyre good enough for first person contact but not one person removed. Sensible, Ms. Fox.

Megan Fox said she's bisexual, but won't sleep with other bisexual women, only gay women. Because, she says, 'men are disgusting' and she doesn't want to sleep with a woman who has slept with a man. So... they're good enough for first person contact but not one person removed. Sensible, Ms. Fox. Nice tights, too.

One of the contestants on The Fashion Show. Clearly, its no Project Runway.

One of the contestants on The Fashion Show. Clearly, it's no Project Runway.

Speaking of Project Runway, this is what Heidi Klum wore to her vow renewal ceremony. Cornrows. When I saw this I actually wondered if she was playing a trick on the paparazzi. Until I saw....

Speaking of Project Runway, this is what Heidi Klum wore to her vow renewal ceremony. Cornrows with beads on the end and a veil made out of pipe cleaners. When I saw this I actually wondered if she was playing a trick on the paparazzi. Until I saw....

what Seal wore. Now I know it was a trick. Im fairly sure theres a world takeover involved here somewhere.

what Seal wore. Now I know it was a trick. There must be a joke in here somewhere, right? Right? Otherwise my faith in celebrity is misplaced, and that would be heartbreaking.

And finally:

Stella is NOT your mother. Thank god.

Stella is NOT your mother. Thank god.

Leave a comment

Filed under sunday best