Ok, several things.
One, the buddy who pointed me at Erin Denver read my last blog, was amused by my apparent blogger crush, and set it up so that we may grab drinks next week. What on earth will I wear? Should I stop saying funny things right now so that I have a bunch stored up? <nibbles fingernails nervously>
Two, I said I’d tell the story of my near death experience. It was both nearly the death of me AND nearly the death of my relationship – that’s how cool I was last Sunday.
Three, I don’t really want to tell that story because it wasn’t really that funny while it was happening. However, I will share this one little gem:
The DB and I walk into a barbecue of his friends. This is the first time I’ve met most of them, with the exception of the hostess. The hostess is, oddly, the ex-girlfriend of an ex-boyfriend of mine. She was immediately prior to me in his dating time-line, and when he and I were dating he was still carrying an Olympic-sized torch. Did I resent this? Nope, not at all – if we each had one ‘erase option’ in our dating history, he’d be mine. We only dated for a few weeks, anyway, so no harm no foul, right?
*why don’t we have ‘erase options’ in our dating history? I’m implementing that right now. Everyone, mentally review your exes, pick your least favorite, and boom, erase. Never happened. You’re welcome.
Anyway, the story of the ex’s ex is not the story I’m trying to tell here. The story I am trying to tell is this:
The DB puts the beer we brought on the porch, and I crack one. Before I even get a sip of my delicious Oskar Blues Mama’s Little Yella Pils (YUM – I’m not schilling for them, I just really do think it’s delish), the DB introduces me to his friend.
“Hi,” says the friend, “how do you two know each other?” It seemed like a weird question – like, how did we meet? Or what is our relationship? I don’t know what he meant, but I do know the correct answer was NOT what came out of my mouth.
“We’re sleeping together.”
Yep. That’s what I said. Turns out it’s a pretty effective conversation stopper. Who knew.